Day 21 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - Don't Call it a Comeback

Ideally I would post Feeling Good (by Nina Simone, Muse or anyone else who has covered the song) but I have already used that. So I'll have to find something else in the next 10 minutes or so.

I hate Jay Leno and I had forgotten about my love affair with the keyboard player in the Shout Out Louds.

Day 20 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - Half Way

After yesterday's debacle/disaster or whatever you want to call it, today was a small step to getting back on track. I managed to at least start the session with a better attitude, which always help. What likely helps more is a slightly more moderated room temperature. I looked it up, official Bikram approved temprature is 105F with 40% humidity. No idea what either of these really mean but that is what it is supposed to be. How often, and how much it varies I am not sure.

Anyways today was positive. An average session in the grand scheme of things but a tremendous success considering I had thoughts, not terribly serious, about calling the whole thing off 24 hours ago. Whenever these thoughts occur I am always reminded that the best thing to do is listen to the instructor - which usually means look straight ahead, breath slowly and calmly and all will be good.

Lesson of the day: In Balancing Stick Pose lately I have had a hard time staying in the posture on either side. Something the instructor said today, well they likely say it everyday, caught my attention. And that was to be looking 4 feet out in front of me. I found that this helps me to get into the pose much easier which is important as its a relatively short pose (10 seconds or so). My only issue is that I now am over-rotating on my top half and having to touch down on the ground to remain balanced. However this is a huge step up from where I was in this pose a week ago. And the balancing series, unlike all the others really are the yardstick (right or more likely wrongly) that I measure the success of individual classes by.


So I am half way and that is worth celebrating for sure. I have been searching for a Blur video to post and that fits the mood of the day, but have not been able to turn up anything yet (Song 2 .. really). First heard in Italy at LIUC in my room in Castellanza nearly 10 years ago:) Gorillaz Feel Good Inc.

Day 19 - 40-Day Bikram Challenge - Losing Battle

Pardon me for repeating myself but how I just said very recently that its incredible how quickly the fortunes can change in Bikrams from good class to bad, to bad health from good and upside down. Poses you were great at you become terrible at seemingly instantaneously.

Now I have likely heard on at least half the days I have gone to Yoga, discussion afterward about how today was the hottest class ever. I have no doubt the temperature varies from day-to-day and class-to-class even. But today was different (you can trust me). It was the hottest class ever. Really. From the water break on, I had to push myself through. And I have been through nearly 20 days straight at this point. I have been there days where I did not feel good, but that feeling of despair, of wanting to quit never came so early and so strongly as today.

If I had to bet, I would say the heat was left on and kept heating up till the break at least. And it was not just me that noticed this, there were more people laying down in class than I had seen since Tanya did a Thursday night class a few weeks ago. Some very skilled and experienced yoga'ers laying on their backs for dead, while hearing gasping for air and heavy breathing between poses elsewhere. A large group for sure, a warmer day for sure as well, but something went with the temperature gauge today.

This became very real for me in Camel pose. I knew I was struggling but I did not realize how much. After I got up from savasana, and tried to move to the first part of the posture up on my knees, as soon as I attempted to lean back I felt so dizzy that I lost my balance and fell forward for a split second. I caught myself but it was really a shock as I have never had that happen before. I rested in savasana, then got up and attempted it again. And the same thing happened: I nearly fainted. I can hear all those people who question why I dont have water during my practice saying I was not hydrated enough, and I can say I ate fine for lunch and drank a lot during the day so I do not think that was it. Apparently moving from savasana to that pose quickly can make you dizzy, plus the heat and plus a little lack of hydration in my body too.

Lesson: It happens. To everyone. Speaking with an instructor afterward, they commented that more than once they wanted to put their head down that day. And that the important thing to do is either start the posture or rest in savasana, not to sit their hanging your head - it drains more energy you do not have:).

So I end today, bitter and beaten and still fighting a lot of negative voice in my head. Not unlike this loud, but great video from Atlas called Battles.

Day 18 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - Loud Pipes

The difference 24 hours makes sometimes is shocking. From two or three subpar classes in a row to a truly excellent class, and maybe the best class ever. I stayed in nearly every single one of the standing poses, even my left which is always far more difficult for me. And when things are going good you can not help but smile a little during the session. And when things start good, you get some of that positive energy the instructors often talk about. I tend to view each pose really as a seperate event but, you can see that good pose runs into good pose sometimes. Perhaps its not just chance.

Really more than anything its focus, Good focus on my knees, being able to see them in the mirror regardless of the class being full or empty hot or cold, and good consistent breathing really does make all the difference it would seem. The floor series was not quite as good, my lower back is still giving me some issues but I pushed as much as I could.

No real session today, cause I would hate to pick just one part. But basically I found myself talking to myself in class, I am sure that's not the focus Bikram would like but I was feel so oddly positive it just started. And more than once I was cheering myself on. So a very uplifting song Ratatat with Loud Pipes. Credit to Colm McDermott for introducing me to these cats who got a little better known from the movie Knocked Up.

Day 17 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - Way Down

Not just a familiar phrase at Yoga. Though more appropriate to say way back. As in lift back, look back, go back, way back, fall back. But, at least for today, it describes my mood and attitude at yoga this morning. Simply put I was in a terrible mood. Negativity coming out of every pore of my body, likely infecting those on the mats near me. I am sure that that 6am start time had something to do with it.

Though I push through. I have lots of space in the room, always good for me. And a clear view of myself in the mirror. And in the end I get through. So if there is a lesson in what was otherwise a not very good class its that focussing on breathing is always the best way to keep pushing through a session you really are not into. One post turns to the next, you stay calmer, some of the negativity goes away and before you know you are done.

Day 16 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - Still Life

Not rock bottom but getting close. Lower back marginally better, whatever a small part of marginally is. Frustrating class. Likely my favourite instructor and he gave me a few shout outs. One on bow pose which isnt my worst posture. But I got the shout out while standing on my right leg which is almost always, regardless of the pose, my worst side.

The bigger surprise is the shout out for Rabbit Pose. As this what posture 24 of 26 and at this point it is all I can do keep myself from quitting getting a shout out on this is uncommon. In addition I am often struggling so much to hold my towel and keep from running over the top of my head, that I typically fall out of this position. But today I was still with a  little focus at the end of the session

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Lesson of the day: Also likely fits best here. I realize that I had been putting a lot of weight on my head for this pose. Moving the weight to my knees instead make the grip easier and the posture easier overall.

Today was really another frustrating day. Lots of negativity energy unfortunately. But I am hoping tomorrow will be better.

Day 15 - 40-day Bikram Challenge -

Ugh. As good as yesterday was, today was a bit of a step backwards. Class was led by the most demanding instructor. This isnt a bad thing, as I realize how hard she makes you work. And the focus on simple things like stretching tall all the time in-between poses is a great point. I suppose that was the lesson of the day. Arms tall, stretching to the roof, elbows pressed against the head, no space between the arms and ears.

And when I do that, the practice becomes instantly a lot harder, but more beneficial. I was also corrected in my posture of a few forms. I am sure I am still doing pretty well all the poses wrong but some more than others. Triangle Pose I still have never really figured out where my bottom arm should be going. I know I am stretching up but really not getting a ton from this pose.

So I suppose lesson of the day is that there are a lot of benefits to just keeping your arms before, during and after poses. Something that has benefits on basically every pose. That's not bad.

I dont mind this instructor, she would be ideal every few days and I am sure her posture clinic would be great. But damn that is one hard, hard session

Day 14 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - 2 weeks

Overall the session was good. I stayed in the second row, which seems to be a good place for me. I like moving around the room. I can not imagine the people who stay in the same spot every day. Bikrams becomes routine enough as it is sometimes, but to see the same angles all the time in the mirrow may be comfortable but boring.

Good effort in the 9.30 class, still my favourite. Not entirely awake or ready to go but strong through the standing series and quite happy with the floor series.

But in Locust Pose my hands are hurting like hell. I am very much favouring the left side of my body. I am also noticing in  Fixed Firm Pose a lot of difficulty in getting my back down on the floor. The last three days have been worse and worse. This is worrying.

Anywhere its 2 weeks. I am happy with that despite the pain. How rare is that I find exactly the right song to post. I've loved the song since I picked it up on Motel De Moka best of the 00's. If you do not know this music blog you should. 99% of the music you have never heard of , and 95% of it you wont find on any other music blog.

Day 13 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - Back

Not sure that the Bill Hicks video is really what brought me back, but today was a step back firmly in the right direction. Likely came in with a better attitude, more focused and wasnt cramme up against the white wall. Instead this time I was crammed against the stone wall:) But it feels like you have more space there than the other spot.

Occasionally they talk about working for one of the other people in the room with you during a posture. And today maybe I was doing that for this guy. Okay not really this guy. Cause this guy is WWE Superstar - The Big Show but the guy behind me basically looked like that. The dude to dudette ratio is usually in the neighbourhood of 1:10. So to see a dude, and a dude this huge at yoga was really odd. And, to tell the truth he did fairly well.

Lesson of the day: In Half Moon Posture more focus on using my lower arms to pull my top arm over my head. This helps to, as they say create a tremendous stretching down the sides of my body.



Song of the day. It is a shame that this video is so terrible cause the song is so good. Rakim - Guess who's back

Day 12 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - Refocusing

Packed house. Hot house. These seem to be old themes by now. I was in a foul mood as well. I was stuck against the wall and didnt have much room for many of the standing series, especially Standing Seperate Leg Pose. And I was bothered by the girl beside me who seemed bored despite only joining into most of the poses 1/2 way though. And I was bothered by the guy in front of my who had lots of room in front of him but basically stuck his feet in my face. And I was bothered by the instructor, who went really slow in the standing series, then to have to race through the floor series and basically skip the Savasana which are proclaimed to be the most important part of the Bikram series.

Lesson of the day - Cobra Pose Leaning back with the head as opposed to raising more with the stomach. I believe I had been lifting too much straight up rather then bending backwards. Will see how this feels tomorrow. And ideally I remember it.

But today ended negatively, for the above reasons and more. And that can not continue. Last night I mentioned to a friend some Dave Chappelle
clips I had seen recently. I also mentioned another comedian I am a huge fan of: The late great, Bill Hicks. I am showing the third of three clips where are from a 2009 episode of Letterman, but its in reference to Letterman pulling the clip from his show 1993. Dave apologizes and speaks with Mary Hicks, Bill's mother. Please do check out  Clip 1 and Clip 2. Bill's comedy helps give some perspective, some challenge to conventional wisdom and lots of laughs.

Day 11 - 40-Day Bikram Challenge - Oh My God

Two stinkers, back-to-back. Not a confidence booster that's for sure. Smaller class than yesterday but not really warmed up. But the room was incredibly hot. Not sure if when I had a bad day I say its cause the room was hot. But today was hot. God damn it was hot. Just as I was starting, or so I thought, to be a little more controlled, cool etc in the room, today was a hot mess. And its always good when I find out its not just me, other people in the change room

Todays lesson since it seems sometimes like I am not making progress I am going to try and record one small gain, lesson and improvement per day - In Savasana all the breathing is in and out of the nose. I do not think I ever realized that before.

But the session today was not good. I gave it pretty much all I had, which wasnt much. But Oh My God (Lissi Dancefloor Disaster Style) was it hot.

Day 10 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - Falling off a Cliff

And back to earth. Quickly. Two great days followed by one very poor day. My first afternoon session in sometime. Sandwiched between a friend and another instructor and standing in front of the podium, just a terrible session. Started bad, got worse, ended worser.

But I made it through. I continued my streak of not taking any water (though maybe I should look into this), and of being in every pose. Not all of them are great. Some of the balancing ones were especially bad today. Still, as they always say to the newcomers, I stayed in the room. And really despite 10 days in a row, I am still really a beginner and I cant fault myself too much for that. Progress has been made in the past two weeks but its slow, inconsistent. But expectations are high. I want to get better, lots better. But today was a setback for sure.

Day 9 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - Gas

How about that. Two strong days in a row! Yeah me. Really what was needed after that shitty weekend and Monday session. This instructor does things a lot differently than the others. She talks about the practice itself a lot, and maybe a little less on what we should be doing. No right or wrong way, though perhaps Bikram would say there is.

Very similar session to yesterday. 9.30. Very good standing series, tenfollowed by so-so floor series. But overall a good day. However, the highlight of the day was in Rabbit pose. Some woman in front of me, row 1 I believe, in between the first and second set, let one rip. Now the room was hot, and you can always hear feet rubbing on the floor, mats rubbing on the floor but this was different. As a guy who has farted once or twice in yoga before, in fact I forgot that yesterday I let go a big loogie while doing the Khapalbhati at the end, I know it when I hear it. And this girl let one rip.

So in her honour. I give you Hugo Montenegro - Classical Gas

Day 8 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - Feeling Good

After yesterdays really subpar session I decided to never do the AM class again unless I had to for scheduling reasons. My body aint warmed up, the room isnt either and I am barely awake. Today 9.30 class with Pat was great. Nice and hot, some really big steps on the standing series though just average on the floor series

But the big news was a couple of shout-outs, if thats what they call it in yoga-land, from Pat on some of my standing series poses. I can't lie, those things make me feel good. Really overall very positive session, especially on the heels of my worst one to date. However the pain in my hamstrings is still there, as is my shoulder. I dont think the shoulder thing is being exacerbated by yoga, but its not likely helping either.

And on the way out as I put up my sticker on the challenge board, I noticed a quickly declining number of people with perfect attendance on the challenge board. Proud I made it 20% of the way so far. Who knows what will happen but I am feeling good. So yeah, in the spirit of Nina Simone, Muse and Feeling Good from what may have been the best live concert ever. Wembley 2007.

Day 6 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - I'm a male model, you know what I mean

Only two classes on Sunday, neither in great times of the day - 10am or 3pm. I went early and the class, not surprisingly was very full. And the room with all those people in it was hot. Fucking hot. But in a new twist it was the first class I went shirt-free the whole time. Perhaps, as many of the other yoga blogs describe, its a part of me starting to love my body, though I dont think thats the case.

Class was lead by my favourite instructor, and she pushes hard, but not too hard and is unfailingly positive throughout. I can really feel the classes getting shorter, though today there was still some very heavy breathing, especially in the floor series when I was clearly running out of gas.

I will attempt the early session tomorrow (6am). I like the idea of waking up very early, getting my body moving and being in a very small class. So in the spirit of my first shirtless class. The Handsome Boy Modeling School

Day 5 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - At the end of the Day

At the end of the day two things are happening since I began the yoga challenge. First of all, I realize that as much as it may hurt, caused soreness, made me want to quit, that I did make it through and I will make it through class tomorrow as well. Secondly, I find myself incredibly tired. A tired I have not felt in a couple of years since i was in serious marathon training.

The progress seems to be coming. Any given prose on any day might be better or worse, but overall I know I am getting better. Better balance, better breathing, better focus, slightly. But today for example I was behind an extremely attractive woman and that caused some focusing challenges. I'd look in the mirror but I wasn't blind to her in front of me. So when that happens, I usually just take off my glasses which makes me more focused on the practice, since I cant focus on people at all.

Today was busy, mats were very close together, and I feel bad for the girls on either side of me. And today was incredibly hot. Not sure how much of that is because of the number of people in the room and how much is from the time of day and how much is preset.

Anyways, at the end of the day. I make it through. I decide what class I am going to tomorrow (10am) and I keep on going.

Day 4 - 40-day Bikram Challenge - Sept Heures du Matin

My first ever 6am class. Again had to do this early class as I had a conference all day today on campus. But I was really worried as the previous nights class was extremely rough and I had not slept much, though I slept fairly well. I dont recall the last time I was up at 5.30. Likely for a drive to the airport. But for that I get lots of music, strong coffee and the windows down.

Instead I contort myself into a Japanese Ham Sandwich  before the sun is even up. Luckily the class was very small, maybe only 10 people. It also seemed not very hot. Maybe it wasnt, maybe having so few people in the room keeps the temperature down.

Whatever the case, I didn't push too hard, and it didn't push me too hard, and I live for another day of yoga. But I did forget to put my blue whale on the board.

Anyways 7am is an hour too late but I can't seem to find any 6am music I like. Jacueline Taieb - Sept Heures du Matin.

Day 3 - 40 - Day Bikram Challenge - False Starts

Showed up for the noon class after coffee with Christie and a couple of hours working at the public library and found I had forgotten my shorts. A desperate search for an extra pair around the studio turned up nothing. I am an idiot. 5.30 class for me.

The 5.30 class was the busiest I had seen in four days. And likely the hottest. This class was tough. The instructor was tough, I was late arriving so I ended up pretty much directly in front of her, and with the post right behind me. Not my favourite place to be in the class for sure. Likely making it worse was a pretty rough and busy afternoon, so I arrived at class already feeling stressed, hot and unsettled. But I struggled through. But all the time knowing that at 6am the next morning I would be back on it.

Day 2 - 40-Day Bikram Challenge

Still not entirely sure if I should be calling this day 2 or day 3 since I snuck in a Monday afternoon session before the great 40-day challenge began. Nevertheless, I did the 9.30 am session, instructed by Pat. Even smaller than yesterday, maybe only 20 people there. Lots of space to move around, and like yesterday, the group seemed very experienced. My groin injury continues to hurt and I didn't push too hard in standing separate leg stretching pose. But other than that it went very well again. Especially the balancing series. I notice a huge difference in that from when I first began in December. Still cant do toe stand, honestly not sure if I ever will be able to.

Long, long work day today so I likely hit a late afternoon class tomorrow, which will be followed Friday am by a very unwelcome 6am class. With a conference on campus all day Friday I cant really fit it in anywhere else. But I am sure there will be a few days where that's the way the schedule goes. This song doesn't really fit my yoga mood at all, but I keep seeing this Adidas commercial and am loving it. Dee Edwards - Why Can't There be Love. 

Day 1 - 40-day Bikram Challenge

I suppose technically today was the first day of the challenge. Turns out my friend Amanda, a seasoned yogaer, is also trying it out as well. The class today was possibly the smallest I have ever been to, maybe only 25 or so people there. Personally, as someone easily distracted, I found this very beneficial. I was able to clearly see myself in the mirror, focus on my posture. I was no worried about bumping into, or falling over top of, someone beside me.

Anyways it was likely one of the top five classes I have had so far. My shoulder, though it hurts nearly every other minute of the day, manages through yoga pain-free. However, in Standing Separate Leg Stretching Pose or Dandayamana - Bibhaktapada - Paschimottanasana as my friends call it see here for example I felt a terrible pain in my groin. Will see how that is tomorrow.

But overall, a really good first day and in the spirit of the start of this, and with some confidence I'll make it through I end with Wolf Parade "I'll Believe Anything".

Day 0 of the 40-day Bikram Challenge

In the last few days I have decided to give this yoga thing a go for real. Since mid-December I have been going to the weekly Karma class pretty much every week. Actually I think I have missed 2 classes only. And, I've enjoyed it. A lot. I still view it as a form of exercise, which I am sure if wrong, but I have loved what a different challenge it is for me physically and mentally.

So yeah at various times of day itll be me at Feel Yoga for 90 minutes, stretching it out trying not to cry and wishing I could listen to my ipod. 

I am excited and we will see how this goes. Today's video. The Faunt's from Edmoton with what may be my theme song for the next 6 weeks.
The Faunt's It Hurts me all the time